Showing posts with label parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label parenting. Show all posts
I am not who I was, any longer.
Thursday, February 7, 2013
The last 5 years I have been through the sort of changes most people might go through over a decade or more. It has been seriously intense and as it dawns on me just how much I have changed, I feel this weird mixture of excitement and fear.
5 years ago I was about to fall pregnant with my second child, I weighed a LOT, I was married (albeit unhappily), and Mum was beginning her cancer battle. Now I am 40 kilograms lighter, my second child is off to kinder, I am separated, Mum is well, and I am a vegan. We could be two different people. For 10 years I have been a full time mum, and letting that go and knowing this is it, is a scary feeling. What do I do with myself now??? Sure they still need me and will for a time yet, but it's not the same, independence has begun. I am the most alone I have ever been. In lots of ways. Friends are heading in different directions with pregnancies, babies, houses... I am sort of out here in the wilderness.
I see this as an exciting time, but it is unsettling and nerve wracking as well. There is a part of me that has a desperate urge to disappear for a bit. All these changes, the failed dating, the confused mind, the emotional weight of my babe heading out into the world - it's exhausted me. I have this need to shut down, switch off and hide in my cave for a while. Of course practically that's pretty much impossible.
What I have done, is book myself a night away. Just one night, but at least it's something. Some space, some time out. As an introvert, I recharge by being alone. I am never really alone for long, though I guess with real kinder hours beginning next week I will get some time. Everything feels chaotic, like a whirl of thoughts I can't quite grasp, unsettled and unstable. It's intense. I don't quite know how to handle it.
End ramble.
Categories:
bittersweet,
change,
children,
emotions,
friends,
kids,
parenting,
relationships,
self,
weight
Farewell 2012
Monday, December 31, 2012
It seems like only yesterday I was reflecting on 2011. This year has gone super fast. It was a busy one, that's for sure.
I've lost another 27 kilograms (60 pounds) this year, a total of 40kg (88p) since my surgery. It feels amazing. I still have a belly I need to lose which will take exercise. Exercise is still my nemesis, and a psychological block exists there that needs to be broken down. Still, I've lost an entire Finn, so to give him a piggy back and realise I used to carry that all day everyday is a pretty awesome comparison. My body is under so much less stress now and there is no question I have prolonged my life by doing this. It makes it easier when food gives me grief or I am having a rough eating day.
This time 12 months ago I had long hair, 1 tattoo, no piercings other than my ears, and I weighed 27kg more. Now I have shorter hair, 2 tattoos and a nose piercing, and am lighter. I feel every day I become truer to who I am and how I express that. It's an amazing feeling.
In 2012 I worked bloody hard at self esteem and self worth. Damn hard. SO hard. I came a very long way. So many things rattled me as I was vulnerable to them but I forged ahead. Again I have a way to go but comparing now to 12 months ago I have come so far it blows my mind. I no longer have a deep seated self hatred and disgust at who I am. I like me - inside and out. And that's a massive change. Next comes self love?
I made and lost friends in 2012 and while each loss shook me (and said esteem) and rattled me and caused me to question myself, each one also cemented who I am and the reflection and self doubt led to more certainty and awareness of myself, and can only be a good thing. The friends I have are not just friends. They are ones I'd trust my life to. They are the real deal. They are more like family. I am so incredibly lucky to have them and it's something I try never to take for granted.
Speaking of family, it went a bit pear shaped this year. My brother and I, who have had a fairly rocky relationship, are no longer in any contact and haven't been since July. I miss my niece and nephew but this is a far better choice for me.
I guess my blog highlights the most impacting change I made this year in my eventual - slow but sure - progress to adopting a cruelty free lifestyle and a vegan diet. It was an on and off road, I struggled and took my time to understand some of the new food options but I was determined. It meant too much to me not to keep trying and exploring it. I am now firmly entrenched in vegan living and nothing has made me happier. It feels wonderful, and it's who I am, inside. In my day to day life, I don't know or interact with any other vegans, except online. It can be isolating at times, and can feel like no one really understands me, although they all try and are considerate of my decision. Attending events like World Vegan Day and the Carols by Barnlight at Edgars Mission were profound and exciting. Being amongst like minds felt like a relief. I could just be me, no justifications, no defensiveness, just accepted and understood. Pretty powerful stuff. I need to expose myself to more of that. The supports I have online are amazing. In fact, I suspect in 2013, things are going to expand and take off again in this area as my good friend Vik and I have so many ideas for our 2 Vegan Girls venture. I am so inspired and excited about it!
My gorgeous Great Dane Gertie came to live with me, and we had a rough year. Poor love was diagnosed with dodgy kidneys and her life span went from 8y to 2y in an instant. It hit hard. She also had 2 incidents of poisoning which scared the hell out of me, but several thousand dollars later, she's still here, and still a giant, beautiful, sook. How I adore her!
We moved house in May, and have a huge block now for kids and animals to run wild. We added rabbits to our menagerie and aside from adjusting to the dreadful cold of winter in a house with high ceilings and a wood fire, it's pretty cool. My children continue to delight me. Finn is smart and wise and hitting preteen stuff at a rapid rate, scaring the bejeesus out of me at how quickly he is growing. RJ is a wicked delight, constantly making me laugh and cringe all at once. Preparing to have both of my children out of the home for a significant portion of the week with school and kinder terrifies me. I have been a stay at home full time mum for 9 years now and this is it. No more. It's scary and makes my heart hurt a bit. I know I will adapt, but it's going to be a rough ride.
I can't close out the rehash of 2012 without mentioning the major highlight. Something happened this year that I never imagined would, that is a dream come true, quite literally. I met the most inspiring and influential musicians - my absolute hands down all time favourite band: The Tea Party. Their music changed my life, changed how I view music and what it can be in life. That they reunited was major enough, but that they came to Australia and I saw them twice, and met them - was able to shake their hands and thank them... Fuck me. That blows my mind, still. What beautiful guys they are, I am so excited to see what 2013 brings for them and for me by extension in listening to what they create. Nothing topped that moment. It was amazing! Telling the guy on the door "no, not a competition winner, JB put my name down..." Nothing cooler. Nothing.
So, what of 2013? I feel like the critical thing to work on next year the same way I tackled esteem this year is laziness. No more having ideas but avoiding actioning them. Write. Create. Move. I know I can do this! No more getting in my own way. Exploring more veganism issues, studying again, and continuing to blossom into the truest Kelly I can be feels exciting. Let's go!
Happy 2013 to you and yours xx
I've lost another 27 kilograms (60 pounds) this year, a total of 40kg (88p) since my surgery. It feels amazing. I still have a belly I need to lose which will take exercise. Exercise is still my nemesis, and a psychological block exists there that needs to be broken down. Still, I've lost an entire Finn, so to give him a piggy back and realise I used to carry that all day everyday is a pretty awesome comparison. My body is under so much less stress now and there is no question I have prolonged my life by doing this. It makes it easier when food gives me grief or I am having a rough eating day.
This time 12 months ago I had long hair, 1 tattoo, no piercings other than my ears, and I weighed 27kg more. Now I have shorter hair, 2 tattoos and a nose piercing, and am lighter. I feel every day I become truer to who I am and how I express that. It's an amazing feeling.
In 2012 I worked bloody hard at self esteem and self worth. Damn hard. SO hard. I came a very long way. So many things rattled me as I was vulnerable to them but I forged ahead. Again I have a way to go but comparing now to 12 months ago I have come so far it blows my mind. I no longer have a deep seated self hatred and disgust at who I am. I like me - inside and out. And that's a massive change. Next comes self love?
I made and lost friends in 2012 and while each loss shook me (and said esteem) and rattled me and caused me to question myself, each one also cemented who I am and the reflection and self doubt led to more certainty and awareness of myself, and can only be a good thing. The friends I have are not just friends. They are ones I'd trust my life to. They are the real deal. They are more like family. I am so incredibly lucky to have them and it's something I try never to take for granted.
Speaking of family, it went a bit pear shaped this year. My brother and I, who have had a fairly rocky relationship, are no longer in any contact and haven't been since July. I miss my niece and nephew but this is a far better choice for me.
I guess my blog highlights the most impacting change I made this year in my eventual - slow but sure - progress to adopting a cruelty free lifestyle and a vegan diet. It was an on and off road, I struggled and took my time to understand some of the new food options but I was determined. It meant too much to me not to keep trying and exploring it. I am now firmly entrenched in vegan living and nothing has made me happier. It feels wonderful, and it's who I am, inside. In my day to day life, I don't know or interact with any other vegans, except online. It can be isolating at times, and can feel like no one really understands me, although they all try and are considerate of my decision. Attending events like World Vegan Day and the Carols by Barnlight at Edgars Mission were profound and exciting. Being amongst like minds felt like a relief. I could just be me, no justifications, no defensiveness, just accepted and understood. Pretty powerful stuff. I need to expose myself to more of that. The supports I have online are amazing. In fact, I suspect in 2013, things are going to expand and take off again in this area as my good friend Vik and I have so many ideas for our 2 Vegan Girls venture. I am so inspired and excited about it!
My gorgeous Great Dane Gertie came to live with me, and we had a rough year. Poor love was diagnosed with dodgy kidneys and her life span went from 8y to 2y in an instant. It hit hard. She also had 2 incidents of poisoning which scared the hell out of me, but several thousand dollars later, she's still here, and still a giant, beautiful, sook. How I adore her!
We moved house in May, and have a huge block now for kids and animals to run wild. We added rabbits to our menagerie and aside from adjusting to the dreadful cold of winter in a house with high ceilings and a wood fire, it's pretty cool. My children continue to delight me. Finn is smart and wise and hitting preteen stuff at a rapid rate, scaring the bejeesus out of me at how quickly he is growing. RJ is a wicked delight, constantly making me laugh and cringe all at once. Preparing to have both of my children out of the home for a significant portion of the week with school and kinder terrifies me. I have been a stay at home full time mum for 9 years now and this is it. No more. It's scary and makes my heart hurt a bit. I know I will adapt, but it's going to be a rough ride.
I can't close out the rehash of 2012 without mentioning the major highlight. Something happened this year that I never imagined would, that is a dream come true, quite literally. I met the most inspiring and influential musicians - my absolute hands down all time favourite band: The Tea Party. Their music changed my life, changed how I view music and what it can be in life. That they reunited was major enough, but that they came to Australia and I saw them twice, and met them - was able to shake their hands and thank them... Fuck me. That blows my mind, still. What beautiful guys they are, I am so excited to see what 2013 brings for them and for me by extension in listening to what they create. Nothing topped that moment. It was amazing! Telling the guy on the door "no, not a competition winner, JB put my name down..." Nothing cooler. Nothing.
So, what of 2013? I feel like the critical thing to work on next year the same way I tackled esteem this year is laziness. No more having ideas but avoiding actioning them. Write. Create. Move. I know I can do this! No more getting in my own way. Exploring more veganism issues, studying again, and continuing to blossom into the truest Kelly I can be feels exciting. Let's go!
Happy 2013 to you and yours xx
Categories:
challenge,
children,
emotions,
family,
friends,
gratitude,
happiness,
heart,
inspiration,
jeff burrows,
kids,
life,
love,
music,
parenting,
relationships,
self,
self-esteem,
tea party,
vegan
Happy heart, happy body!
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Yesterday I finally got around to visiting Edgar's Mission. It's a farm sanctuary here in Victoria and I have been meaning to visit for a good year now but had never gotten around to it. I decided to take the kids to their carols by barn light event. As it turned out my poor fair children were wilting in the extreme heat after barely 2 hours and we ended up leaving before the carols even began! A shame, but we filled the time we did have there so well. There was loads of vegan food (kids devoured vegan brownies and vegan ice cream), hundreds of likeminded people (several with the 269 tattoo), and happy, trusting, secure animals. I dont think I've ever enjoyed something more. So wonderful!!! The kids enjoyed it, petting the animals and there was an education room where they had a pretend sow in a sow stall and pretend chickens in a crammed cage and I was able to explain it to the kids. I hope it gets them thinking. I said to them when they were petting a turkey, THIS, THIS is why we are not having turkey for Xmas this year kiddos.
There were a few stalls set up too with merchandise and whatnot. I grabbed a great book from the store there as well called The Pig Who Sang to the Moon by Jeffrey Masson. I've heard a lot about this book so I am looking forward to reading it now. I feel inspired after this visit. There's something incredibly special about seeing the animals you've been wanting to save by going vegan up close and personal. It reaffirms your beliefs, and strengthens your commitment. Makes me want to do more and be more, and has me writing again. Blessings! Below is the article I wrote after interviewing Pam for World Vegan Day.
Edgar’s Mission is a not-for-profit farm
sanctuary for rescued farm animals. Located in country Victoria, Pam Ahern and
Edgar’s Mission are continually saving lives, conducting public outreach and
offering a humane education program to the public.
In an ideal world, Pam hopes to see herself
out of business, with no need for a place like Edgar’s Mission to exist. A
world where the need for a farm sanctuary is no longer, where humans have moved
into a deeper awareness of animal rights and cruelty free lifestyles. Pam works
flat out, trying to meet the demands not only of the animals, but also in
making rescues, campaigning and spreading the word, not to mention
administrative tasks.
Pam suggests that a growing vegan market
and awareness of a cruelty free lifestyle is much attributed to technology and
the ease with which people can access information about vegan lifestyle
choices. Additionally, “the threat of global warming has started a shift in
people’s attitudes. People are
beginning to be open to the idea that the status quo isn’t appropriate
anymore. They understand that it
is imperative to consider the environmental and ethical impact of the choices
they make.”
The Edgar’s Mission website http://www.edgarsmission.org.au/ offers
many ideas for the public to help the animals at Edgar’s Mission, from
adoption, to donation, to volunteering for a day of hands on farming. There is
also an online store offering everything from clothing to books and bags. 100%
of the store’s proceeds go back into the farm and it’s animal residents.
Edgar’s Mission offers a unique visiting
experience for volunteers and for vegans, it’s exciting to see first hand
exactly what they dream of – a kind, happy, animal farm. By stopping by their
stall at World Vegan Day, you can meet for yourself one of Edgar’s Mission’s joyful,
content, animal ambassadors!
Vegan Parenting
Friday, November 23, 2012
Am finding this a super interesting though and topic lately. Having again cut dairy as well as eggs and meat, I find it strange that I still provide all these items to my children. Why? Well, I also provide chocolate and treats sometimes whilst knowing they aren't good for them. All in moderation, so forget that - but having omnivore children means I am buying and cooking meat. As a vegan, that is confronting and challenging, but the alternative is demanding my children be vegan, despite having allowed them to develop a taste for meat whilst I was eating it as well. Just because I have change my mind and beliefs, doesn't mean I force them to, right?
Or does it? It's really a grey area, I think. I guess where I sit on it, is that my role is to provide options and information. I don't sugar coat what the are eating. It's dead animal flesh. They know that. I have had a few talks with my 9 year old about it, and he asked why dairy if it doesn't kill the animal and I explained veal and separation of mother and baby etc. He was horrified, but struggles because he enjoys the taste of these things. I reassure him that is okay, after all, it took me 34 years to reach that place. He is 9, in time, maybe. I want my kids to make their own informed choices, but I don't want to force it on them anymore than I'd force a religion or even atheism on them. It's their choice to make.
Is that controversial? Maybe, but it works for us.
Or does it? It's really a grey area, I think. I guess where I sit on it, is that my role is to provide options and information. I don't sugar coat what the are eating. It's dead animal flesh. They know that. I have had a few talks with my 9 year old about it, and he asked why dairy if it doesn't kill the animal and I explained veal and separation of mother and baby etc. He was horrified, but struggles because he enjoys the taste of these things. I reassure him that is okay, after all, it took me 34 years to reach that place. He is 9, in time, maybe. I want my kids to make their own informed choices, but I don't want to force it on them anymore than I'd force a religion or even atheism on them. It's their choice to make.
Is that controversial? Maybe, but it works for us.
Happy Birthday, me.
Friday, November 16, 2012
So, it's my birthday. I'm 35. I wasn't feeling good about turning 35, it just felt like I'd reached a crest and am now on the other side. From youngish to Middle Aged. Closer ever closer to the big four-oh. But, it sure beats the alternative. If I'm not aging I'm dead!
When I think about my life and look at the bigger picture, there's so much to be grateful for. There's so much to love about being me. I challenge myself endlessly for self growth and am making some pretty awesome leaps and bounds. Physically and mentally I'm a different person to the me of 12 months ago and I'm really proud of that.
I spend my life in the company of the most amazing friends anyone could imagine. The people in my life are not just people to pass time with or good mates. They are inspiring. They are real. They care about me and they cheer me on. They cry with me they celebrate with me and they genuinely care about my life and my happiness. I'm so lucky to have so many of those people in my life. It's overwhelming. I'm so grateful. From all over the world, my friends make my life so special every single day.
And my children. Who couldn't feel good about a life with these two in it?! My reserved, smart, sensitive, son who feels things so deeply and just wants to please. My funny, feisty, happy sunshine daughter who makes me giggle daily. So different to one another but so bloody amazing. They're my life. They're my reason. I'd do all the hard painful parts of my life over and over if it meant they are mine. I'm incredibly lucky to have them.
I've a friendship strengthened by blood bond with my mum and sister that fills me with a deep sense of belonging and happiness that comes from knowing I'm understood. Truly understood. I talk to mum every single day. She knows all my secrets and loves me completely. Nothing tops that feeling.
I have things I believe in passionately. Causes, creative ventures, things that make my soul sing and hum. I vibrate with life. I'm happy. I'm 35.
When I think about my life and look at the bigger picture, there's so much to be grateful for. There's so much to love about being me. I challenge myself endlessly for self growth and am making some pretty awesome leaps and bounds. Physically and mentally I'm a different person to the me of 12 months ago and I'm really proud of that.
I spend my life in the company of the most amazing friends anyone could imagine. The people in my life are not just people to pass time with or good mates. They are inspiring. They are real. They care about me and they cheer me on. They cry with me they celebrate with me and they genuinely care about my life and my happiness. I'm so lucky to have so many of those people in my life. It's overwhelming. I'm so grateful. From all over the world, my friends make my life so special every single day.
And my children. Who couldn't feel good about a life with these two in it?! My reserved, smart, sensitive, son who feels things so deeply and just wants to please. My funny, feisty, happy sunshine daughter who makes me giggle daily. So different to one another but so bloody amazing. They're my life. They're my reason. I'd do all the hard painful parts of my life over and over if it meant they are mine. I'm incredibly lucky to have them.
I've a friendship strengthened by blood bond with my mum and sister that fills me with a deep sense of belonging and happiness that comes from knowing I'm understood. Truly understood. I talk to mum every single day. She knows all my secrets and loves me completely. Nothing tops that feeling.
I have things I believe in passionately. Causes, creative ventures, things that make my soul sing and hum. I vibrate with life. I'm happy. I'm 35.
My nest is emptying a little
Saturday, November 3, 2012
I'm scared. There. I've said it. Scared may even be an understatement. Here's the backstory - I tried for almost 3 years to conceive my son. Eventually, I did so, and he is my precious firstborn. He's now 9, and in grade 3, time is flying by at a pace I cannot keep up with. We started trying for a second child when he was just 6 months old, knowing how long it had taken to get him, and aware the same challenge may present itself. In fact, it was worse. It took five long, pain filled years, rounds of clomid, of artificial inseminations, of giving up altogether, then of IVF and finally, finally, my beautiful daughter was conceived and came into this world. She is turning 4 next month. You know what that means, right?
It means next year she is off to kindergarten. 15 hours a week there, before beginning school in 2014. And I... I can hardly bear to think of it. That sounds dramatic, but you must understand how longed for my babies were. How much I have valued every second that slips past faster than I can grab onto it. How much I enjoy their company. When RJ was just two months old, my Mum was diagnosed with breast cancer. That first year of her life was a blur of chemo, surgeries, and fear. Not to mention the masters thesis that I had to write and submit. Mum is now three years cancer free, my masters is completed, and my baby girl is about to start leaving the nest.
I don't know how to prepare myself for this. Just thinking about it makes tears well up on my eyes and my heart pound. I know I am overreacting and I know I will adjust. God help me when they leave home. I am going back to school next year, so that will help me stay busy while she is gone. I have the Two Vegan Girls project to invest myself in. I just know I will feel like I am missing a limb when my little sidekick is no longer here beside me, permanently. It will be okay... right?? :(
It means next year she is off to kindergarten. 15 hours a week there, before beginning school in 2014. And I... I can hardly bear to think of it. That sounds dramatic, but you must understand how longed for my babies were. How much I have valued every second that slips past faster than I can grab onto it. How much I enjoy their company. When RJ was just two months old, my Mum was diagnosed with breast cancer. That first year of her life was a blur of chemo, surgeries, and fear. Not to mention the masters thesis that I had to write and submit. Mum is now three years cancer free, my masters is completed, and my baby girl is about to start leaving the nest.
I don't know how to prepare myself for this. Just thinking about it makes tears well up on my eyes and my heart pound. I know I am overreacting and I know I will adjust. God help me when they leave home. I am going back to school next year, so that will help me stay busy while she is gone. I have the Two Vegan Girls project to invest myself in. I just know I will feel like I am missing a limb when my little sidekick is no longer here beside me, permanently. It will be okay... right?? :(
Retrospective guest blog!
Thursday, November 1, 2012
Nothing like missing ones own guest blogging post. Oops! Back in September would you believe, I guest blogged for the fabulous Veggie Mama! http://www.theveggiemama.com/ 2012/09/ guest-post-veggie-mama-vs-omniv ore.html I love Stacey's recipes. They are vego without being tasteless or - god help me - all insanely healthy and raw. Taste, not missing out on yums, that's what I am all about. She has the lot. Love her stuff.
What are you about?
Monday, October 15, 2012
So, I have no idea what my blog is about. When asked to categorize it, I sort of say 'er.. parenting I guess, although, probably more cooking at the moment. Oh and books, I talk about books a lot...'
In other words, I have NO freaking idea. And just as I start to be concerned about this, and worry that I have no niche and no target, I remember I don't care. I just write about stuff. Stuff I want to talk about. Not many people read it, but that's okay, because it means I can talk about a hodge podge of life in general, and I'm not turning anyone off. Because when I started this blog, blogs were exactly that - a web log. A diary of someones thoughts and experiences. They were not big business, and they were not targeted to specific audiences. That works for me. So, on that note, here is today's hodge podge of everything that smooshes together in my life right now.
Books. I am reading non stop, and was reading a mix of fluff and crime and mystery, but have found myself freaking out too much at the scary books lately, so am on a run of fluffy chick lit at the moment that has escapism firmly planted in its ethos. Bliss. Given I've had this stupid cold/flu thing, it's quite timely.
Writing. Every time I open my... well, I suppose I can call it a story? A book it is not. My writing, anyway, every time I open the file I look at it, feel stupidly overwhelmed, and so promptly close it again. This is Not. Good. Writing. Practice. It's just that it's such a mash at the moment of research, fiction, time sequences are all over the place, and it's quite simply, a big fat mess. My lovely friend, Jess, tells me that the most difficult part of a story happens from 20-30,000 words and if I can get past this hurdle, things will be better. I can see how that is true, I just have no idea how to push through this portion that is the draft from hell.
Food. I'm all about Mexican this week. Because how good is Mexican food?! And it's so freaking easy to vegetarianise (made that word up). Right now in my fridge I have portobello mushrooms, capsicums, and onions marinating in fresh chillies, garlic, lime and lemon juices and paprika and cumin. Helloooo vegie fajitas! And every week I make refried bean burritos and chilli sans carne. So freaking good. So, I was scoping out more ideas for Mexi-Vegi goodness and I have some awesome recipes up my sleeve to try soon. Mexi pot pies, mexi pasta, vego nacho, and this interesting burrito bake that has me intrigued and uncertain, but curious enough to try.
Gertie the great dane now lives in a run for most of the day, she has her own leather couch and all. Spoiled rotten. And she has free runs 3 times a day for a couple hours. Given she mostly sleeps, this seems to work well, and keeps her safe. No more toxins and emergency vet bills. So far. Knock wood.
Parenting is as amazing as ever. I really am so lucky to have scored two of the coolest kids. Finn is 9 and the smartest kid I've ever known. His NAPLAN results were off the chart. Literally. Super smart, and sweet as hell, he's uber nerd like his parents, totally into Dr Who and Minecraft. Love it. Miss RJ is 3 and hilarious. Such a cheeky little bugger, thinks shes hilarious (and usually is). I currently have the worlds biggest Barbie Dreamhouse in my car for her birthday. I want to keep it.
Life... well, life is pretty awesome right now. I am on track with stuff, I have happy texts pinging my phone most days of recent... ;) And I am looking forward to uni next year (enrolled already!) The only thing that could add a touch of sweetener is some more freelance, paid, writing work. So... Get in touch all you editors. I'm a good work. Guy. (Thanks, Lenny).
Picture Credit: http://weheartit.com/entry/40126860/via/abillest
In other words, I have NO freaking idea. And just as I start to be concerned about this, and worry that I have no niche and no target, I remember I don't care. I just write about stuff. Stuff I want to talk about. Not many people read it, but that's okay, because it means I can talk about a hodge podge of life in general, and I'm not turning anyone off. Because when I started this blog, blogs were exactly that - a web log. A diary of someones thoughts and experiences. They were not big business, and they were not targeted to specific audiences. That works for me. So, on that note, here is today's hodge podge of everything that smooshes together in my life right now.
Books. I am reading non stop, and was reading a mix of fluff and crime and mystery, but have found myself freaking out too much at the scary books lately, so am on a run of fluffy chick lit at the moment that has escapism firmly planted in its ethos. Bliss. Given I've had this stupid cold/flu thing, it's quite timely.
Writing. Every time I open my... well, I suppose I can call it a story? A book it is not. My writing, anyway, every time I open the file I look at it, feel stupidly overwhelmed, and so promptly close it again. This is Not. Good. Writing. Practice. It's just that it's such a mash at the moment of research, fiction, time sequences are all over the place, and it's quite simply, a big fat mess. My lovely friend, Jess, tells me that the most difficult part of a story happens from 20-30,000 words and if I can get past this hurdle, things will be better. I can see how that is true, I just have no idea how to push through this portion that is the draft from hell.
Food. I'm all about Mexican this week. Because how good is Mexican food?! And it's so freaking easy to vegetarianise (made that word up). Right now in my fridge I have portobello mushrooms, capsicums, and onions marinating in fresh chillies, garlic, lime and lemon juices and paprika and cumin. Helloooo vegie fajitas! And every week I make refried bean burritos and chilli sans carne. So freaking good. So, I was scoping out more ideas for Mexi-Vegi goodness and I have some awesome recipes up my sleeve to try soon. Mexi pot pies, mexi pasta, vego nacho, and this interesting burrito bake that has me intrigued and uncertain, but curious enough to try.
Gertie the great dane now lives in a run for most of the day, she has her own leather couch and all. Spoiled rotten. And she has free runs 3 times a day for a couple hours. Given she mostly sleeps, this seems to work well, and keeps her safe. No more toxins and emergency vet bills. So far. Knock wood.
Parenting is as amazing as ever. I really am so lucky to have scored two of the coolest kids. Finn is 9 and the smartest kid I've ever known. His NAPLAN results were off the chart. Literally. Super smart, and sweet as hell, he's uber nerd like his parents, totally into Dr Who and Minecraft. Love it. Miss RJ is 3 and hilarious. Such a cheeky little bugger, thinks shes hilarious (and usually is). I currently have the worlds biggest Barbie Dreamhouse in my car for her birthday. I want to keep it.
Life... well, life is pretty awesome right now. I am on track with stuff, I have happy texts pinging my phone most days of recent... ;) And I am looking forward to uni next year (enrolled already!) The only thing that could add a touch of sweetener is some more freelance, paid, writing work. So... Get in touch all you editors. I'm a good work. Guy. (Thanks, Lenny).
Picture Credit: http://weheartit.com/entry/40126860/via/abillest
A giggle
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Was reading this library book to my 3 year old yesterday, and came across this page. Maybe it's just my dirty mind, but I was in hysterics! A friend suggested it was 50 shades of Shrek, lol. Certainly a tricky one to read out loud without dissolving into fits of immature giggles.
Changing Kelly
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
My life is such an unplanned mystery right now. I have friends who are happily married, raising kids, planning families, buying homes... But I am heading in a completely different direction. My children are growing. One is at school, one starts kindergarten next year. I have no partner to move forward with. I don't say this in a sad way at all. I'm happy where I am, it's just such a different place from everyone else, and I can't predict it. I have no idea. In some ways, it's actually quite exciting.
When you combine that with how much I have changed in the past few years, it really does feel exciting and new. I feel more certain now, of who I am, and more comfortable with that person. Friendships have changed, some have been lost, some have been strengthened; they're solid and they accept me for me. Brash, honest, passionate and loyal. I'm more confident in my own self, and maybe that's an age thing. Hmm. Wisdom sounds better than age... :)
I'm vegetarian, all but vegan, and I am so confident in that choice. Passionate about it, and it brings a deep seated joy that was unexpected, because I am being true to my values and beliefs.
I've lost 39 kilograms (86 pounds) in the past year, and whilst I have a way to go, I feel so much more alive, have so much more energy, confidence and such better health. I look at the photos of me below and I get emotional. My face is back, chiselled out of the fat that threatened to swallow it. For the first time, I feel beautiful. Feminine. Sexy!
I have no idea what the future brings, but my gut instincts tell me it's going to be worth waiting for. Worth the crap I've waded through to get to. Worth the dodgy men, the surgery, the confronting of who I am and being honest and truthful and authentic in myself. All worth it.
When you combine that with how much I have changed in the past few years, it really does feel exciting and new. I feel more certain now, of who I am, and more comfortable with that person. Friendships have changed, some have been lost, some have been strengthened; they're solid and they accept me for me. Brash, honest, passionate and loyal. I'm more confident in my own self, and maybe that's an age thing. Hmm. Wisdom sounds better than age... :)
I'm vegetarian, all but vegan, and I am so confident in that choice. Passionate about it, and it brings a deep seated joy that was unexpected, because I am being true to my values and beliefs.
I've lost 39 kilograms (86 pounds) in the past year, and whilst I have a way to go, I feel so much more alive, have so much more energy, confidence and such better health. I look at the photos of me below and I get emotional. My face is back, chiselled out of the fat that threatened to swallow it. For the first time, I feel beautiful. Feminine. Sexy!
I have no idea what the future brings, but my gut instincts tell me it's going to be worth waiting for. Worth the crap I've waded through to get to. Worth the dodgy men, the surgery, the confronting of who I am and being honest and truthful and authentic in myself. All worth it.
Categories:
authenticity,
emotions,
friends,
life,
parenting,
relationships,
self,
self-esteem,
vegan,
vegetarianism,
weight,
weight-loss
Deliciousness
Monday, October 1, 2012
Before I move on, in reference to my last post - obviously we lost hope and the worst outcome became reality. Everyone has been affected by the story, and it's certainly left me feeling less safe on a night out. I hope her killer is brought to justice, swiftly.
Moving on, I'm back to another food post.
My wonton soup was ahhhhmayyyzing. I'll be making that again for sure. So delicious. And vegan! Less successful was my made from scratch Rogan Josh curry, which was just slightly bitter, and I can't pinpoint which ingredient was the culprit for it. The satay was quite good though, I also made the curry paste for that from scratch too. My Chickpea, feta and marinated vegetable salad - looked divine, tasted too vinegary. The marinade (bought) was too strong for my liking. Asparagus, broccoli and cheese pasta and Italian Suppli were winners (vego not vegan, had cheese). The most surprising win was the tofu kebabs. I don't really do tofu, but in the homemade BBQ sauce, caramelised up... so tasty! Would absolutely eat again and a great protein source to boot.
I also had great success with my vegan cheese experiment. It was s tasty and so cheeselike, I may be able to give it up and go full vegan yet. I have hope, finally!
My 9 year old wanted to cook dinner one night this week, so I let him choose what he wanted to make. He chose pizzas so we got some passes, some pizza sauce, and various toppings. He made ham and cheese for himself and his sister, and he made me a delish onion and mushroom one. So tasty, he did such a good job of doing all the cutting and using the hot oven and so on. I reckon we'll keep this up...
A good friend (Megan over at Living a Truly Blessed Life) sent me a recipe for vego sausage rolls. I was curious, because they really looked the part, so I gave them a go. They had a slight hint of oatiness to them (rolled oats was a big ingredient) but omg they were yummy and the texture was absolutely sausage rolly. But not scary meat! Even the 9yo gave them the thumbs up and declared them better than the ones from the shop (ie meat ones) he didnt even realise they were vego. WINNING.
I went to my sisters for lunch this week. She put on the BEST vegetarian lunch spread. I wanted to eat ALL THE THINGS. She had lentil burgers, chickpea and spinach sausages, falafel, salads, wraps, cheeses, antipasto... it was amazing. She sent me home with leftovers which went down a freakin treat. I really loved how much of an effort she made to make me something so delicious and so vegetarian. It was really special.
I seem to be getting a few repeat meals in rotation now which is good, means I've found meals I am seriously enjoying. Added in as new experiments this week are a tomato and cheese risotto, vego fajitas and for Grand Final day BBQ I did the most delicious mushroom and halloumi kebabs, corn on the cob with herb butter, and fried ravioli with fresh hommus. Far out it was good. I love food!
Moving on, I'm back to another food post.
My wonton soup was ahhhhmayyyzing. I'll be making that again for sure. So delicious. And vegan! Less successful was my made from scratch Rogan Josh curry, which was just slightly bitter, and I can't pinpoint which ingredient was the culprit for it. The satay was quite good though, I also made the curry paste for that from scratch too. My Chickpea, feta and marinated vegetable salad - looked divine, tasted too vinegary. The marinade (bought) was too strong for my liking. Asparagus, broccoli and cheese pasta and Italian Suppli were winners (vego not vegan, had cheese). The most surprising win was the tofu kebabs. I don't really do tofu, but in the homemade BBQ sauce, caramelised up... so tasty! Would absolutely eat again and a great protein source to boot.
My rogan josh curry paste. home made! Toasted my own spices and all!
The rogan josh curry
chickpea, feta and marinated vegetable salad. looks better than it tasted.
Wonton Soup
Italian suppli
BBQ Tofu and fried rice
My 9 year old wanted to cook dinner one night this week, so I let him choose what he wanted to make. He chose pizzas so we got some passes, some pizza sauce, and various toppings. He made ham and cheese for himself and his sister, and he made me a delish onion and mushroom one. So tasty, he did such a good job of doing all the cutting and using the hot oven and so on. I reckon we'll keep this up...
A good friend (Megan over at Living a Truly Blessed Life) sent me a recipe for vego sausage rolls. I was curious, because they really looked the part, so I gave them a go. They had a slight hint of oatiness to them (rolled oats was a big ingredient) but omg they were yummy and the texture was absolutely sausage rolly. But not scary meat! Even the 9yo gave them the thumbs up and declared them better than the ones from the shop (ie meat ones) he didnt even realise they were vego. WINNING.
I went to my sisters for lunch this week. She put on the BEST vegetarian lunch spread. I wanted to eat ALL THE THINGS. She had lentil burgers, chickpea and spinach sausages, falafel, salads, wraps, cheeses, antipasto... it was amazing. She sent me home with leftovers which went down a freakin treat. I really loved how much of an effort she made to make me something so delicious and so vegetarian. It was really special.
I seem to be getting a few repeat meals in rotation now which is good, means I've found meals I am seriously enjoying. Added in as new experiments this week are a tomato and cheese risotto, vego fajitas and for Grand Final day BBQ I did the most delicious mushroom and halloumi kebabs, corn on the cob with herb butter, and fried ravioli with fresh hommus. Far out it was good. I love food!
I am judging you. Probably.
Sunday, September 23, 2012
I recently realised something about myself. I'm kind of judgemental sometimes. This is upsetting because I always thought that I wasn't. I'd see, for example, debates raging on parenting choices and I'd shrug and say "I don't know you and your child, only you know what works for you" and I'd feel almost smug about not judging people.
But recently two things have happened where I have found myself getting upset and judgey mcjudgepants at people. And I don't like it.
Firstly, I get annoyed when people don't display the same levels of friendship or loyalty that I do. Just because I would react in a fiercely loyal way, doesn't mean others have to. I get hurt when they don't, yet it's unreasonable of me to expect they do. It's kinda tough to be honest. I don't know how to handle that at all.
And secondly, if you eat meat, I am judging you for it. Big time. I am trying to accept that people have their reasons for consuming meat and that I can't and shouldn't think less of them for it, but you know what? I do. I can't see any reason that outweighs the suffering and murder of innocent animals. I just can't. There is no reason good enough for me.
I don't know what to make of this new side to me. I don't like it, it's not a pleasant way to be. But it's also difficult to stop myself doing. I guess being aware of it is a start, but from here out, I am not sure where to go with it. Maybe this is a stupid post to hit send on. Now you can all judge me for being judgey?!!
Categories:
animals,
compassion,
controversy,
emotions,
emotive,
food,
friends,
learning,
parenting,
self,
society,
stereotypes,
vegan,
vegetarianism
Harry Potter party
Saturday, August 18, 2012
So the boy asked for a Harry Potter themed party for his 9th birthday. The internet is a trove of ideas for such an event and I nabbed some fab ideas from all over the place and set about making them into a reality. I started several weeks before the event and pottered about making fel ties, bertie botts boxes and wands long in advance. The party went off without a hitch, and there were some very happy wizards about the place.
A collection of creepy things! On the end are wands made using dowel and hot glue gun and paint. Each has a tag stating what it is made of (eg elm with phoenix feather), felt Hogwarts house ties, and gross things... Bloodworms, hippogriff gizards, blind cat eyes, gillyweed etc (spaghetti in tomato sauce, smoked oysters, cocktail onions, weeds in green water!)
The polyjuice potion and Elixir Of Life bottles were filled with water for those not wanting butter beer. My funky broomstick is a Martha Stewart knock off!
Yes I made butter beer. It was like a spider, sooo good!
The sorting hat sorted each kid (thank you iphone app!)
The entry to the party! I made this using an old sheet, a square sponge and some brick colored paint. Nothing flash but looked effective.
A collection of creepy things! On the end are wands made using dowel and hot glue gun and paint. Each has a tag stating what it is made of (eg elm with phoenix feather), felt Hogwarts house ties, and gross things... Bloodworms, hippogriff gizards, blind cat eyes, gillyweed etc (spaghetti in tomato sauce, smoked oysters, cocktail onions, weeds in green water!)
The polyjuice potion and Elixir Of Life bottles were filled with water for those not wanting butter beer. My funky broomstick is a Martha Stewart knock off!
Finn made the Wizard Collector cards to go with these himself!
I wrapped truffles in gold foil and attached white wings to each for snitches. So cool!
These were chocolate coated licorice sticks, dipped in melted white chocolate then sprinkles.
Wizard hat cupcakes.
Cheeseymite scrolls.
Hogwarts house cupcake tower
Each child took home their wand, one of these fabulous cookies from Crumbs of Yum, a spellbook and a Bertie Botts box of beans.
It really was a fantastic success and a lot of fun!
Cookies from: https://www.facebook.com/crumbsofyum
Butterbeer recipe from: http://bakingdom.com/2010/11/butterbeer-oh-yes-friends-butterbeer.html
Bertie Botts Box template from: http://61098.deviantart.com/art/Bertie-Botts-176610553
Jar labels from: http://www.ivillage.com/12-easy-ideas-wizard-worthy-harry-potter-birthday-party/6-b-139571#139574
Categories:
birthday,
children,
craft,
creativity,
decorate,
fun,
harry potter,
kids,
parenting,
parties
Happy 9th Finn xx
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
I was just reading an old journal of mine...
They lifted him straight onto my tummy and I burst into tears and just said "my darling boy.. oh my god..." and then i said "it IS a boy isnt it?!" It was and Josh cut the cord. Josh and i just looked at each other and at this squeaky little creature. They suctioned a bit of fluid from his mouth and he crid a bit but my god... he was just beautiful. Looking up at us.. words cant describe how i felt at that moment. So happy and in love and relieved and thrilled. All of that and more. We were in awe completely...
Who would believe that was nine years ago today? 9 YEARS. It has gone so fast. This child of mine, he is amazing. He is sensitive, sweet, kind and so generous. He is smart and funny, and he has the most divine heart. He could change this world. The world is so much better off for having him in it. I cannot believe he is mine, that I am responsible for such an amazing child. I don't know how. I take no credit, it's just who he is.
Before him, I was just me, just Kelly. After, I became Mama. A whole new element to my being, and one I cherish every single day. As he gets older, we relate in new ways. We still have that closely connected almost freakish bond, but instead of it being purely emotion based, he can now articulate things, and it takes on an even cooler dimension.
He is a lot like his dad, in nature, and in personality. For example he is mad on Dr Who and Star Wars. I totally claim the Harry Potter obsession, though! He is great at maths and can read something stellar. I cannot imagine where he will end up someday, all I know is the world is his oyster. He can easily do anything he wants to. His talents are so broad.
I absolutely adore him, my darling mooey. Proud doesn't begin to describe it. So much love on your birthday moo, I love you. ALWAYS. No matter what.
Partyin. Wizard style.
Sunday, July 1, 2012
Finn wants a Harry Potter party this year. I dare you to google 'harry potter party' and see how many hits you get. And for many of those hits, the work, effort, time and money involved has been INSANE. It's a touch stressful, but inspiring too. I've already spent too much money at spotlight on crafty stuff (one has to make wands and house ties and fancy invites and such after all). There are still 6 weeks to go. Today the hot glue gun I got (I know, me, a hot glue gun - it's so funny!) is getting a work out. I had NO idea how one worked but I seem to have figured it out. Then J took it off me and he's doing it. We're making wands. As you do. Hot glue on dowel makes patterns, then painted and distressed a bit and voila. Mega cool. I'm even gonna attach cards saying what each wands is made from (e.g. vinewood and dragon heartstring). YES I AM.
I KNOW - I am the coolest Mum evah.
I am even making butterbeer. For real. Non alcoholic though I may slip rum in my own... And various other Harry themed foods (snitch truffles wrapped in gold foil and with feathers stuck on, herbology crudites etc.)
I am even planning to make these cool floating candles - battery powered tea lights in the ends of empty loo rolls, hung with fishing wire. SO COOL. I even found a template for Bertie Botts Every Flavor Beans to whip up. Should keepme us busy over the school hols anyways.
Anyway, must go, am up to my elbows in Gryffindor ties.
I KNOW - I am the coolest Mum evah.
I am even making butterbeer. For real. Non alcoholic though I may slip rum in my own... And various other Harry themed foods (snitch truffles wrapped in gold foil and with feathers stuck on, herbology crudites etc.)
I am even planning to make these cool floating candles - battery powered tea lights in the ends of empty loo rolls, hung with fishing wire. SO COOL. I even found a template for Bertie Botts Every Flavor Beans to whip up. Should keep
Anyway, must go, am up to my elbows in Gryffindor ties.
Hearts...
Monday, May 7, 2012
I have so much to write about but no time to write it! I had an amazing weekend in Sydney, one I will take my time and post blogs for as I find time. I am moving house this week so things are hectic and I am not sure when I will get time to do it. But it'll come. Promise!!!
I did want to make time to write about the thing that struck me most on my weekend in Sydney. I have a friend, she's already been through a lot in life. She lost her best friend to a horrible invasive cancer, and she has the most adorable boy, and he's so sick. I had breakfast with her Saturday morning, and we got chatting for quite a while. She's an amazing woman.
Today would have been her best friends birthday, I don't know if that makes this post good or bad timing. It's not really either. I just wanted to write about what she is going through now. Her 15 month old son has HLHS, a heart condition called Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome. You can read a little about it here - it isn't easy reading and I find it hard to get my head around the science and the technical things.
He has half a heart, and it's amazing that he has managed 15 amazing months. I think things are misunderstood a little because he looks so healthy and happy - people tend to forget just how seriously ill he is as a result. When I spoke to my friend about it, trying to understand it and how it effects their every single day, and how she manages... some of the stupidity she faces from people who don't get it... It made my head spin.
What perspective it gives to see someone who copes with this every moment of her waking life. She just goes on. I know she has to, but.. how?? I don't understand a lot about the condition yet but I am reading and I am learning. What I have read is terrifying. Makes me want to do something. I believe that HeartKids is a great organisation to support for families going through this hell. Heart Kids works towards reducing both the incidence and the mortality rates of childhood heart disease. There's one in each state. You can volunteer or donate, support fundraising, buy merchandise, sponsor... There are a myriad of ways. Check them out, and contribute. The families you are supporting need places like these. The children who are going through this and all the operations... they need it.
I did want to make time to write about the thing that struck me most on my weekend in Sydney. I have a friend, she's already been through a lot in life. She lost her best friend to a horrible invasive cancer, and she has the most adorable boy, and he's so sick. I had breakfast with her Saturday morning, and we got chatting for quite a while. She's an amazing woman.
Today would have been her best friends birthday, I don't know if that makes this post good or bad timing. It's not really either. I just wanted to write about what she is going through now. Her 15 month old son has HLHS, a heart condition called Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome. You can read a little about it here - it isn't easy reading and I find it hard to get my head around the science and the technical things.
He has half a heart, and it's amazing that he has managed 15 amazing months. I think things are misunderstood a little because he looks so healthy and happy - people tend to forget just how seriously ill he is as a result. When I spoke to my friend about it, trying to understand it and how it effects their every single day, and how she manages... some of the stupidity she faces from people who don't get it... It made my head spin.
What perspective it gives to see someone who copes with this every moment of her waking life. She just goes on. I know she has to, but.. how?? I don't understand a lot about the condition yet but I am reading and I am learning. What I have read is terrifying. Makes me want to do something. I believe that HeartKids is a great organisation to support for families going through this hell. Heart Kids works towards reducing both the incidence and the mortality rates of childhood heart disease. There's one in each state. You can volunteer or donate, support fundraising, buy merchandise, sponsor... There are a myriad of ways. Check them out, and contribute. The families you are supporting need places like these. The children who are going through this and all the operations... they need it.
Sample vegan meal plan
Saturday, April 28, 2012
This is my meal plan for the next two weeks. I hope it inspires you!
Moroccan Vegetable Stew with CousCous
Powerbean balls and Rainbow Salad
Adzuki Bean Burgers (or maybe just veggie not burgers since the kids love those)
Asparagus and pine nut tart
Spaghetti Bolognese
Mushroom and Asparagus risotto
Vegan Enchiladas
Vegan Chilli
Vegan Alfredo
Jerk Sloppy Joes with coconut creamed spinach
Chickpea cutlets
Tacos
Spinach, mushroom and leek filo parcels
Vegan potato bake
Moroccan Vegetable Stew with CousCous
Powerbean balls and Rainbow Salad
Adzuki Bean Burgers (or maybe just veggie not burgers since the kids love those)
Asparagus and pine nut tart
Spaghetti Bolognese
Mushroom and Asparagus risotto
Vegan Enchiladas
Vegan Chilli
Vegan Alfredo
Jerk Sloppy Joes with coconut creamed spinach
Chickpea cutlets
Tacos
Spinach, mushroom and leek filo parcels
Vegan potato bake
How did I get to vegan??
Friday, April 27, 2012
So, what is MY story? What made me decide to eschew meat and instead maintain a plant based diet? Well, it's recent and at the same time, it started long ago. On a basic level, I've always loved animals. What child doesn't, I suppose? They're in our stories, they're on our television programs, cartoons, and we're taught to treat our pets with love and respect.
When I was 10, our family moved to the country. My parents bought a small farm, and we had chickens, ducks, cows, and had inherited an ancient sheep from the previous owners. We had 30 acres on which to enjoy these animals, and my responsibility, one of my chores, was to feed and water the chickens, and collect their eggs. They were free range, and I remember going to get the first lot of chickens we kept from a battery farm. My parents saved them from their cages, and we took them home to a lovely big yard, and paddocks beyond that they could roam during the day. I recall them not really knowing how to walk. After being crammed in cages likely since birth, they didn't know how to use their legs. They lifted them and took a long time to set them down again, unsure what process to take to walk. I guess it was one of the first moments I had that I truly felt and thought about farming practices?
I also recall that any time I found a chicken dead - almost always just a result of old age or the elements, would scream a blood curdling cry as though I were being murdered. I remember getting told off for scaring my poor mum with such cries, but I would be devastated and cry and cry for the poor chickens end. Interestingly, I don't really remember when 'Lady' the sheep died. She was so old and so stubborn but quite lovely. Hand fed and happy to be petted she was a funny old thing. Very much the pet.
You can see how farm life, and pet life sort of intermingled for me. It was never strict farming, yet they were never complete pets either. I recall our neighbour, very much the farmer, coming to show my dad how to cut the heads off chickens. I remember how the chickens ran around without their heads. I remember, for some reason I can't recall, handling severed ducks feet. Just the feet. I remember watching them castrate the calves - how they'd just throw them down, slice open their testicles, and then pour disinfectant straight on and send them running again, blood running down their legs. I remember the mother cows, bellowing for calves sent to market. Separated. I never handled these things well. I always got TOO upset. Almost to the point of frustrating and upsetting my folks for being overly dramatic. I never accepted it. I still ate meat, it was our way of life. We always had and it never crossed my mind not to, until the day they slaughtered one of our cows, and filled our freezer. I remember them serving it up, that slightly different smell that fresh meat has as compared to the supermarket processed variety. And I remember saying.. "you want us to eat Molly??" And refusing. I remember the frustration of my parents. They didn't force me to, but I don't think they were too impressed that I refused my meal, either.
Still, I never tried being vegetarian. Once off the farm it was a case of out of sight out of mind to a degree. And habit. So I ate meat. And cheese. And milk. And eggs. All of it. And often.
I would say it has only been in the last two years that this has become the focus of my life again. I credit that to my friend, Christie, from America. We struck up a friendship, and she is a strict vegan, and a creative foodie, so often our conversations turned to food, and her reasons for eating vegan and I learned more about vegan cooking and she inspired me to try some recipes. Christie, her boyfriend Brent, and their friend Melissa, run one of my favorite vegan food blogs, Turning Veganese. I love seeing what they come up with, cursing it when I can't find the ingredients in Australia, cheering loudly when I replicate their success.
She got me thinking, and mid way through last year, I decided to cut meat from my diet entirely. I couldn't bring myself to remove cheese and dairy, however, but I ate vegetarian. I felt great, I lost weight, and it was really something that felt true to who I am, at the core of my being. I still couldn't imagine life without chocolate, though, despite a dear friend, Vik, sending me vegan chocolate to try (and my enjoyment of it!) I then had gastric sleeve surgery, because I felt that despite the 6kg I lost eating vegetarian, I was still dangerously overweight and years of trying to lose the weight had not found success. This operation would. Post op, I slowly reintroduced foods through liquids, mushies, and eventually solids and a normal diet. Because protein was so important in recovery, and because my knowledge of easily accessible protein was meat meat meat, dairy dairy dairy, I resumed eating those foods again. It was the lazy way to ensure I met my protein requirements with a new smaller stomach.
A month or so ago, I began to look into veganism with renewed interest. I spoke at length with my friend, Vik, who is vegan and who directed me to endless fantastic resources, films, articles, information... The more I read, the more it made sense to me. For animals, for the environment, and for my health. Vik made some suggestions for replacement cheeses (I do so love cheese, it is the thing most difficult for me) and I decided to try some new recipes. Vegan recipes. Soon after, I began my 2 week vegan challenge. I am a n00bie vegan, for sure. I am still feeling my way. I am still finding my resources and informing myself. I am having a lovely time with cooking and creativity and new foods in the kitchen. I feel happier and more settled in life in general. This is right for me. This is true to me.
My son, who is 8, often remarks that he doesn't want to eat animals, and that he wants to be vegetarian, but that he loves the taste of meat. I explained that it's okay. It took me 34 years to be ready, and he would come to it in his own time if it is right for him. At the same time, I offer meat alternatives every day, and allow him to take them up as he wants to. Sometimes he does. We had a great discussion about how vegan is different to vegetarianism. He wondered why I don't eat dairy, if it isn't killing the cows. I explained about mothers and babies being separated. I saw the light of identification and empathy in his eyes and the sadness on his face. I like being able to give him information to make informed choices. Maybe some day... :)
So that's my lot. I feel like all the pieces of a life long puzzle are snapping into place and that this is being cemented. I feel committed to this now. It's my truth.
When I was 10, our family moved to the country. My parents bought a small farm, and we had chickens, ducks, cows, and had inherited an ancient sheep from the previous owners. We had 30 acres on which to enjoy these animals, and my responsibility, one of my chores, was to feed and water the chickens, and collect their eggs. They were free range, and I remember going to get the first lot of chickens we kept from a battery farm. My parents saved them from their cages, and we took them home to a lovely big yard, and paddocks beyond that they could roam during the day. I recall them not really knowing how to walk. After being crammed in cages likely since birth, they didn't know how to use their legs. They lifted them and took a long time to set them down again, unsure what process to take to walk. I guess it was one of the first moments I had that I truly felt and thought about farming practices?
I also recall that any time I found a chicken dead - almost always just a result of old age or the elements, would scream a blood curdling cry as though I were being murdered. I remember getting told off for scaring my poor mum with such cries, but I would be devastated and cry and cry for the poor chickens end. Interestingly, I don't really remember when 'Lady' the sheep died. She was so old and so stubborn but quite lovely. Hand fed and happy to be petted she was a funny old thing. Very much the pet.
You can see how farm life, and pet life sort of intermingled for me. It was never strict farming, yet they were never complete pets either. I recall our neighbour, very much the farmer, coming to show my dad how to cut the heads off chickens. I remember how the chickens ran around without their heads. I remember, for some reason I can't recall, handling severed ducks feet. Just the feet. I remember watching them castrate the calves - how they'd just throw them down, slice open their testicles, and then pour disinfectant straight on and send them running again, blood running down their legs. I remember the mother cows, bellowing for calves sent to market. Separated. I never handled these things well. I always got TOO upset. Almost to the point of frustrating and upsetting my folks for being overly dramatic. I never accepted it. I still ate meat, it was our way of life. We always had and it never crossed my mind not to, until the day they slaughtered one of our cows, and filled our freezer. I remember them serving it up, that slightly different smell that fresh meat has as compared to the supermarket processed variety. And I remember saying.. "you want us to eat Molly??" And refusing. I remember the frustration of my parents. They didn't force me to, but I don't think they were too impressed that I refused my meal, either.
Still, I never tried being vegetarian. Once off the farm it was a case of out of sight out of mind to a degree. And habit. So I ate meat. And cheese. And milk. And eggs. All of it. And often.
I would say it has only been in the last two years that this has become the focus of my life again. I credit that to my friend, Christie, from America. We struck up a friendship, and she is a strict vegan, and a creative foodie, so often our conversations turned to food, and her reasons for eating vegan and I learned more about vegan cooking and she inspired me to try some recipes. Christie, her boyfriend Brent, and their friend Melissa, run one of my favorite vegan food blogs, Turning Veganese. I love seeing what they come up with, cursing it when I can't find the ingredients in Australia, cheering loudly when I replicate their success.
She got me thinking, and mid way through last year, I decided to cut meat from my diet entirely. I couldn't bring myself to remove cheese and dairy, however, but I ate vegetarian. I felt great, I lost weight, and it was really something that felt true to who I am, at the core of my being. I still couldn't imagine life without chocolate, though, despite a dear friend, Vik, sending me vegan chocolate to try (and my enjoyment of it!) I then had gastric sleeve surgery, because I felt that despite the 6kg I lost eating vegetarian, I was still dangerously overweight and years of trying to lose the weight had not found success. This operation would. Post op, I slowly reintroduced foods through liquids, mushies, and eventually solids and a normal diet. Because protein was so important in recovery, and because my knowledge of easily accessible protein was meat meat meat, dairy dairy dairy, I resumed eating those foods again. It was the lazy way to ensure I met my protein requirements with a new smaller stomach.
A month or so ago, I began to look into veganism with renewed interest. I spoke at length with my friend, Vik, who is vegan and who directed me to endless fantastic resources, films, articles, information... The more I read, the more it made sense to me. For animals, for the environment, and for my health. Vik made some suggestions for replacement cheeses (I do so love cheese, it is the thing most difficult for me) and I decided to try some new recipes. Vegan recipes. Soon after, I began my 2 week vegan challenge. I am a n00bie vegan, for sure. I am still feeling my way. I am still finding my resources and informing myself. I am having a lovely time with cooking and creativity and new foods in the kitchen. I feel happier and more settled in life in general. This is right for me. This is true to me.
My son, who is 8, often remarks that he doesn't want to eat animals, and that he wants to be vegetarian, but that he loves the taste of meat. I explained that it's okay. It took me 34 years to be ready, and he would come to it in his own time if it is right for him. At the same time, I offer meat alternatives every day, and allow him to take them up as he wants to. Sometimes he does. We had a great discussion about how vegan is different to vegetarianism. He wondered why I don't eat dairy, if it isn't killing the cows. I explained about mothers and babies being separated. I saw the light of identification and empathy in his eyes and the sadness on his face. I like being able to give him information to make informed choices. Maybe some day... :)
So that's my lot. I feel like all the pieces of a life long puzzle are snapping into place and that this is being cemented. I feel committed to this now. It's my truth.
Why vegan?
Monday, April 23, 2012
So some of you in twitter land have been considering the 2 week vegan challenge. I'm impressed. So why vegan, you ask? Well, lots of reasons. I have to say I have been having fun simply with the food preparation part since I began. I like trying new recipes, I'd never cooked with tofu before, but look how my first dish came out!
Looks drool worthy right?! I KNOW. It tasted amazing! I'm so excited! And last night I made Vegan Chickies samosas... Absolutely divine. And the big news? EVEN THE KIDS ATE THEM. Okay, well one kid. The 3 year old baulked but the 8 year old devoured them. Yes!!!
Other reasons for considering a vegan lifestyle include health. I have not yet watched the following myself (maybe today? life is hectic!) but I am told it is the best film to watch in regards to healthy living and how veganism offers that. It's called Forks Over Knives. I'd be interested to hear your thoughts on it if you watch it.
More links to recipes and food ideas coming tomorrow. If you haven't already started, get into this 2 week vegan challenge. Your body (and a bunch of animals) will thank you.
Looks drool worthy right?! I KNOW. It tasted amazing! I'm so excited! And last night I made Vegan Chickies samosas... Absolutely divine. And the big news? EVEN THE KIDS ATE THEM. Okay, well one kid. The 3 year old baulked but the 8 year old devoured them. Yes!!!
Other reasons for considering a vegan lifestyle include health. I have not yet watched the following myself (maybe today? life is hectic!) but I am told it is the best film to watch in regards to healthy living and how veganism offers that. It's called Forks Over Knives. I'd be interested to hear your thoughts on it if you watch it.
More links to recipes and food ideas coming tomorrow. If you haven't already started, get into this 2 week vegan challenge. Your body (and a bunch of animals) will thank you.




























































