Where to start?

It's been a while since I blogged. A lot has happened. I went to America, I fell absolutely in love with New York City and had nowhere near enough time there. I enjoyed LA and I had a fabulous trip in general, but NYC was just head over heels love. I loved Broadway, and saw The Lion King which was brilliant. I loved 5th Avenue, I loved FAO Schwartz, I loved Central Park, I loved Times Square despite all the crushing people. There was so much more I wanted to do but didn't get time for, I'm so glad I decided to do that jaunt! Even the flight was interesting, flying over Colorado mountains and the Grand Canyon. It was really a good trip, and I came home planning to return, someday...

I was pretty homesick and missed the kids dreadfully, I got such a lovely welcome home from them though. So much love and cuddles. Beautiful.

The day after I got home, still jetlagged and out of it, we found my 15 year old and very first fur baby dead on the back deck. He was cold, and starting to stiffen, he'd been there a while. He was drooly and his bladder had emptied as well, so he was covered in ick, but I scooped his still body up and cried and held him anyway. He had been around since I was 18, since 1996, he was my baby. So many memories. He had such a personality. He would go nuts for eggs and - get this - low fat muffins. I don't know why but he LOVED those things and would stand on your head to get them! I was so grateful he had waited for me to get home before going. Seems silly, but a comforting thought anyway. I am sure that Hendrix will look after him. Losing two fur babies in one year has been really hard. Both were really special, and part of the family, they were pre kids, pre marriage... all my adult life. It has been tough. I miss them dreadfully. :(

I came home considering intermitting my uni studies as well. I'm not enjoying it, I feel at a point in life of readjustment. Like the world is my oyster and there for the taking... but how to do so? How do i want to? I want to travel more. I want to write... And I feel a strong need to just BE. To stop planning, stop controlling everything in my life and just roll with whatever comes my way. It's hard for a control freak to do that.

I have a writing idea simmering and I am excited about that, just waiting for it to develop itself into more than a vague rumination. it will come in time. I look forward to it. I want to use my spook...