A little bit of fun

I have added a poll over to the left top of my page. I'll take it down in a week. For now, I want you to help me decide what to write about next. I have ideas for most of the opposite, but I can't decide which I feel most compelled to write. I am especially interested in hearing opinions from those who have read my ebook and know my style and voice.

A young adult piece with a strong female character (none of these sulky twihards), a love story full of passion and heart, something set in the past, maybe encompassing a few elements, or something with grit and fear at its centre. Let me know what you think. If there is a decent response, I'll go for it.

More Ebook news

So, since I launched my ebook on amazon, I've had some fantastic feedback. Most feel the emotion in my writing strongly, which is really a good feeling as a writer, to affect. That is my entire goal, it's good to know I am achieving it. I got to tired of reading, re reading, editing, re writing the same pieces that by the time I hit publish, none of them appealed to me personally anymore. A little space from them will be good for me, so I can love them again in the future. It's scary putting your work out there like that. Knowing people will read it and likely forever think differently of you, good or bad, one way or another. It's scary putting something you agonize over in the public arena for critique. But it is also empowering and exciting. I definitely felt a thrill seeing my name up there as Author.

Thank you for all the feedback. Again, I have yet to work on a one click paypal download order. If you would like to get a copy and don't have amazon (kindle or iphone/android apps), then by all means send me an email at feistykel@gmail.com and I can invoice you $4.70AUD via paypal and send you the download manually once payment is received. In the meantime, I am continuing to write a longer novel. I keep finding myself starting new projects and not finishing others. It's time to get disciplined!

Happy reading :)

Gardening for kids

So, inspired by one of my lovely friends, I've decided to get the kids into some vegetable gardening. I'm thinking a few planter boxes and/or pots, easy and small to start with. Finn is currently into this at school. Each class at his school started a compost bin, worm farm, and took responsibility for planting a different vegetable each. So he is inspired, and keen to teach me all he knows! We sat down tonight and made a list of vegetables he wants to grow:

* Capsicum (bell peppers)
* Spring Onions
* Carrots
* Lettuce
* Tomatoes
* Snow peas
* Strawberries

Quite the summer salad we'd have there! I think I may do some herbs as well. So, I am drawing up some plans for a planter box garden, I think RJ will get the watering can job, which she will love. I'll keep you posted on our progress!

Meet 4 of my closest friends

Watch any popular movie or TV soap, and you'll soon realise we women are supposed to have a circle of close friends that we see regularly, and can tell anything to. We are supposed to shop with them, party with them, and entrust everything to them.

But how many of us actually have those friends in reality? Until recently, I had friends, but not the inner circle I have now. It takes a lot of trust and courage to be able to let people that close. I wish I had done it long ago. it's the best thing I ever did. I have so many wonderful friends. Some I see often, some only online. They are all supportive, and love me for me. I am extremely lucky. I also have a few that I see often, and that know all my secrets. Let me tell you about my inner circle.

Megs.

I first met Megan in about 2005, she was just marrying her partner, Andrew, and was keen to start a family. I had Finn, and she and I bonded over parenting. I always kept a degree of distance, I'm not even sure why. But when my marriage faced imminent breakdown, I let her in and told her everything. She was supportive. She never judged. She just cared. 6 years later, I am godmother to her 4 gorgeous sons, and we have girly best friend dates where we see movies, or share a meal, or go for a walk. We are inseparable, and so alike in so many ways.

Fleur.

I met Fleur a while back, must have been around 2007 ish. We were friends for years, but we never really spent large amounts of time together. That all changed around 18 months ago, when we somehow broke the pattern of a more distant friendship, and became closer. We share secrets, confidences, and let me tell you, you fuck with one of us, you fuck with both of us. I'm protective of Fleur. I can't tell you why, god knows she can fight her own battles. I think she is more sensitive a soul than she lets on sometimes. She's inspiring, and she's a fuckton of fun. And boy can she party. Paloozas would not be paloozas without our Fleurbie!!

Annabel.

Anna I met less than 15 months ago. Now part of the party pack, she is another of my closest friends that I love to see as often as possible. Anna is a sweetheart, I love going out with Anna because she has such a free and happy spirit. She dances with wild abandon, and she has confidence I envy. You need a job done, Anna will get it done. She is loyal, and generous and I am so glad that we became friends!

Christie.

Christie is different. I've only ever seen her face in person once. She lives on the other side of the world, yet her friendship is as important to me as if I saw her daily. In fact, I do, in a way. I email her almost every single day. I tell her every thought, every insecurity, and every achievement. I regard Christie as a teacher of sorts. From her, I have learned to be a stronger woman. I have gained more self confidence, and I have learned about relationships, communication, and happiness from within. She inspires me. And I will continue to nag her to put together a Vegan cook book. Food so good you don't even notice meat missing. So much yum! She is a smart cookie. I'd be a bit lost without her, that's for sure.



I am so grateful for these friendships. But beyond the close intimate ones, I am grateful for the words of support that come from a tweet, an email or a text. That will pick me up with a kind word when I have a bad day. These friends I may not see often, I may not contact daily, but every one of them is valued and treasured. I really feel lucky to have so many wonderful people in my life.

Random thoughts on our young women/ Challenging the stereotype of drunken men.

What's up with the young women of today? You go into the childrens clothing section of any major department store and for girls as young as 5 and 6 there are mini skirts and navel flashing shirts. Really?? Do we really need to sexualise them so young? I know I sound old saying this... but, when *I* was a preteen, holding hands and peck kisses were a massive deal. We weren't skanky and trying to win the approval of guys in skimpy clothes and promises of sexual attention. What is going on??

In fact, this growing notion of disempowerment in favor of male approval infiltrates so many areas of pop culture that it's no wonder young women behave this way more often. I read the Twilight series. I read a similar series recently, minus vampires, add in angels. In both of these, the female protagonist is a simpering, ditzy, twit, who will give up her own beliefs, wants and strength, all "for love." Seriously? Where the hell are strong female young women who tell a guy that does them wrong to bugger off? Who have chutzpah and self respect and value themselves?? I worry about raising a daughter in our current society. I hope that she has more guts than the common portrayal of a 'popular' and/or loved teenager.

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Whilst I am on stereotypes and the like, I wanted to challenge one. What do you think of when you imagine a drunk guy? Do you think creepy, sleazy, violent or gross?? That's what we are led to think right? That's the common image presented to us by media most of the time.

I disagree. Strongly. Every time my friends and I have had a night on the town in the last year, we have encountered a huge number of drunk guys. None of us have ever found them to be anything other than friendly, fun, and happy. I went out last Saturday night, I spoke to a few drunk guys and had some good chats. Many others would courteously allow me past with a smile and a step back. Some would randomly hug me without speaking a word as they made their way through the crowd. Clearly drunken behaviour, but lovely all the same. Those who flirted did so without being pushy or rude. When we left, a group of guys gave up their cab so that we could put our drunken friend in first and get her home safely. That's gentlemanly. It's generous and its kind. It gives me hope. Give the 'drunk guy' label a change. I think it's surprisingly and happily wrong in most cases.

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What do you think of these issues? Let me know with a comment.

Ebook

Hi all, the ebook is now available to purchase for kindle, or on your amazon for iphone/android/blackberry apps. I hope you enjoy the stories, I'd love to hear your feedback on any you enjoy (and those you didn't!) I'm working on a download via paypal, but it's taking some time for my non html inclined brain. ASAP I will let you know when that option is working.

Here's the link to The Result Of Coercion.

Happy reading!

My Mum

Do you ever have moments - morbid ones - where you think... What the hell am I going to do if/when I lose my Mum? Or is that just me being morbid? (almost certainly).

Thing is, my Mum is a best friend. I tell her everything. Literally everything. Even the TMI stuff. She 'gets me' in a way that no one else on earth gets me. I can be all kinds of versions of myself with her and she accepts them all, good, bad, ugly, beautiful and loves me anyway. No matter what evil I have done.

This is not a given for any mother. Some mothers do not deserve their title. Some mothers don't know their children at all, let alone how their brains tick. Some are abusive. Some are just awful. My Mum never really had a good mother herself. She didn't learn from a role model how to be a good Mum. She made it up as she went along. And she did it brilliantly. People often tell me I am a good Mum and they admire my parenting. It's credit to her. I had that good model.

She knows how to handle me when I am anxious, when I am sad, when I am happy. And when I am sick or sad, I still, even at 33, think to myself... "I want my Mum" :( I remember feeling that way at 8, in the sick bay at school, and I'd hear the familiar jingle of her keys and see her familiar shoes pass by the window with its blind half down and I'd feel this enormous sense of "ahhh it'll be okay now."

I remember walking around in her hot pink high heels that I just LOVED, when I was around the same age, and hoping that some day, I'd be a mother as good as her. I've not managed it yet, but there's still time.

Every bedtime, she would always leave the room saying quietly, "Mummy loves..." I now say the same thing to my own babes each night. It feels special. She and RJ share their middle name, it's a little honour, but it never feels enough. What could?!

I'm not sure how I'd ever get by without her. I love you, Mum!

The puzzle of life

I feel like all the pieces of my life puzzle are laid out in front of me. I know the end picture will be one of happiness, contentment, and peace. I can feel its within my grasp. I just need to work out how and where all the pieces fit and in what ratio.

Some days I get so frustrated by the pieces and trying to work out the combination to making them fall into place. Other days, I enjoy the exploration that it requires. I am trying to enjoy life in every moment, not just when the puzzle is complete. To enjoy DOING the puzzle, too.

I am going to make myself an inspiration cork board for my room. I need to see beauty every day, and things that bring me joy. It's all about the small stuff :)



photo credit: http://weheartit.com/entry/11165494

Blogging in the AUS

"Use your blog to connect. Use it as you. Don't “network” or “promote.” Just talk. NEIL GAIMAN."









So, a few times I have made some half hearted ramble about how I blog for me, and I don't think I could do the "pro blogger" thing, but I've never really articulated what I was finding 'off' about the pro blogging world. Then I read this blog entry by one of my fave bloggers, Little Miss Moi. She nailed it. It's BORING!!! I don't want to read multiple product plugs. I don't want to read about competitions, networking and blogging conferences! I want to read about LIVES. I want to read about thoughts, ponderings, events in your real world!!!

I was so glad to read that it wasn't just me. I also think it's kinda boring to read solely about parenting (I know, GASP OF HORROR, I can't believe I said it 'out loud' either!) I mean, I adore being a Mum, I often blog about my kids or parenting. But there is more to Kelly than MAAAMAAA. I want to know all the facets that make you, you. What are your hopes, your dreams, your passions? Write about that, not the latest product you're peddling. PLEASE!!!!

Choosing Life, month 2

As I mentioned close to a month ago in this entry, I planned a new outlook on my life. I've certainly been pretty self reflective this month. My blog entries have been kind of strange as a result. It's good though, because it's giving me the opportunity to track my thoughts and processes.

Two weeks ago, I spoke of setting goals, and I wanted to update on that. Given it's only been 7 weeks since I went overseas, there has been little progress on the travel plans. Sure has not stopped me dreaming, though. I also had an extremely talented friend, Emma, from Little Cherry Tree Designs (who designed this blog for me) take some of my travel snaps from my NYC visit and tinker with them. Next week, I am getting them enlarged and printed up for my walls. I cannot wait. This is one of the pics...



Love it. Great mementoes from the trip too. Each time I see the pics, I will be reminded of all those fabulous memories!

Writing, I have not written a word. Sigh. I don't know where to begin so I just don't begin. I need to choose ONE project, and complete it, regardless of any other ideas or doubts. I just need to do it, my greatest problem is motivation, I get overwhelmed and I just don't. I need to address this.

I did buy an enlarger and film camera off ebay, and will continue to stock up on dark room fittings until I have something usable. It's fun sourcing the items, and I need to take a class as well I think. I need to take a class on this, language classes, and dog training classes... Need more time!

I have been making plans with friends, too. Gold class movies, wild alcohol fuelled nights, and seeing my favourite band are all in my near future.

Very slowly, I am getting a grip on what I need and want and getting it all in order. I feel like a child learning at the moment. Who knew I was such a stranger to myself?